Meanwhile, as I go through collage life, I met new bunch of friends, including Malays. This time they don't mind my English anymore, as we're all in need of improvements. I was the junior with the guitar and my seniors and me had fun till night. And to top that, since I got more SPARE TIME than my junior classmates, we often in to club nearby our collage.
Well, they got in there, I don't. Besides the age limit fear, I wasn't interested in club music much to enter one. Still, I'd go if they took me along.
Now don't get me wrong, I only ordered COKE. And cigarettes. At times Even when they took me there, I didn't go in. I waited outside in a mamak stall near there with my guitar. Just minding my own business. Then there's this two girls came to the stall. One of them seams like my senior in F&B class. While the other, was..., different.
IDK, she's not pretty or whatever, but.. Its just like, you know how it is when you look at something, and then you wanna look at it again, even when you memorized the whole image in your head, you still wanna look at it again.? That how it is... Since I'm the most obvious person to look at in the stall (I'm holding a guitar in a mamak stall in the middle of the night, unless you're blind, you would do it too), I didn't feel awkward when they start looking at me. But, I never kept my eyes off one of them.
Hey, I'm not one of those guys you know that goes around hunting a DAHI LICIN OK? In fact, I don't even know how to flirt!
Yeah, I don't know how to flirt. I mean, put it this way, would any divorced mother of a single child, teach her teenage son how to flirt with a girl? Well, mine don't. She would expect me to learn for myself.
How am I to learn without seeing my dad's face in the mirror every morning?
So, as I was telling you, one of the girls seams different to me. I never put any thoughts on it until one day she came to me while I was playing my guitar(it attracts everyone around me whenever I start playing, IDK, maybe I'm too loud?) and we started talking. You know, the usual stuffs. The where, the when, the how, the who, the why however made them think I'm crazy. But better still, I was being completely honest with her. Straight honest to be exact, I'm kinda hypnotize by her being there with me. Not an everyday routine that people asked me things bout past.
So after that day, we started to bump each other quite a lot of times. And in time we became very close friends. We usually go out together take a stroll in a nearby park. At night most of the time till early morning.
(We didn't do anything illegal except for being alone with a non muhrim, and she's not a Muslim anyway)
Till my senior told me that she's 4 years older than me and engaged.
(yeah... she a little short one. lol)
So I started to feel uneasy with the situation. She noticed that, and finally told her reasons to being around me. She said she was running away. Away from the engagement and her father that insist on her marriage. She wanted to be free from all that, so she came to peninsular to study as a standard excuse. Still, when the time comes, she has to leave for home.
(She's a sabahan, btw).
What would you do in this situation?
I didn't really know what I was thinking, I decided not to give a damn. I told that if she needs a friend to ease her mind of things, I'm always around, and I do what I can. But there is however a question to fill.
Why me? Why not someone her age or older? That remains unanswered even now. She just said that one day, I might came upon this situation, or met anyone that does, I'll understand why.
(LV, if you're readin this. Hell-ou!! Newsflash baby, I STILL DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU'RE TALKIN ABOUT!!) So there I go, being her research Ginni-pig for the (hers) suffering heart. We still BERKEPIT together in the park as usual for the rest of the semester.
As any awkward relationships, things has to come to an end. She leaves for Ranau on October 3rd, 1997. And for the second time in my life, I felt like killing myself. I didn't even say goodbye, or accompanied her to the airport. Guess I felt kinda hurt inside and angry that she has to go. All I have left of her is an address, of her old house in the village of Ranau.
(Hmm... I wonder where I kept it)
